Ila Grey White

Ila Grey McIlwean White, 89, of Hertford, North Carolina, passed away peacefully on January 24, 2026, at Elizabeth City Health and Rehabilitation in Elizabeth City, North Carolina. She was born on September 30, 1936, in New Bern, North Carolina, and lived a life defined by service, learning, family, and gracious hospitality.

Ila Grey was the beloved daughter of Earl Closs McIlwean and Ila Mable Soles McIlwean. From an early age, Ila Grey displayed a love of education and a deep commitment to helping others, values that would guide her throughout her remarkable life.

She graduated from New Bern High School and went on to attend the Women's College of the University of North Carolina, UNC Greensboro, where she earned a Bachelor of Science in Home Economics. Ila Grey later earned a Master's Degree in Adult Education from North Carolina State University, a foundation that supported her lifelong dedication to teaching, public service, and family life education.

Ila Grey devoted her professional career to improving the lives of families across eastern North Carolina through the North Carolina Cooperative Extension Service and North Carolina State University. She served for 14 years as the Perquimans County Extension Agent, working as both a 4-H Agent and Home Economist, and later spent 22 years as the Northeast District Area Agent of EFNEP, the Expanded Food and Nutrition Education Program, within North Carolina State University's Family and Consumer Sciences program covering 20 counties in northeastern North Carolina. Her work touched countless families, helping them build healthier, stronger, and more informed lives.

Her contributions were widely recognized. Among her many honors, Ila Grey received the Distinguished Service Award from the National Association of Extension Home Economists in 1977 and was named North Carolina Home Economist of the year in 1983. Ila Grey also served as State President of the North Carolina Economics Association and was a member of the inaugural Board of Directors of the North Carolina Family and Consumer Sciences Foundation. In a lasting legacy of generosity and commitment to education, Ila Grey established the Ila McIlwean White Family and Consumer Sciences Program Endowment Award through North Carolina State University.

Throughout her life, Ila Grey was deeply involved in her faith and Community. Ila Grey was a devoted member of Beech Grove Methodist Church in New Bern and Hertford United Methodist Church, and she actively supported numerous state and community organizations dedicated to strengthening Eastern North Carolina.

After her retirement, Ila Grey continued to share her love of history, culture, and learning. Ila Grey worked as a tour guide at Tryon Place and the Charles Stanley House in New Bern, and later with Bosch, also known as BSH, Research and Development Laboratories in New Bern. Ila Grey had a special interest in historic architecture and antiques, and lovingly returned to and restored her family home, transforming it into a beautiful Southern showplace. Ila Grey was also passionate about genealogy and family history, preserving the stories and roots of those she loved.

Ila Grey was known for her warmth and hospitality, and every gathering she hosted, whether large or small, was filled with care and charm. Ila Grey loved entertaining, sharing her skills with others, reading and traveling. She brought elegance and thouhtfulness to all she did. Above all, Ila Grey was most proud of her children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren.

Ila Grey is survived by her daughter, Alice White Copeland and husband, Kelly of Hertford, NC; her son, William Anderson "Andy" White and wife, Amy of Nags Head, NC; her grandchildren, Kelsey Copeland Booth and husband, Tyler, Jordan Copeland Garrett and husband, Brett, Katie Copeland Johnson and husband, Wes, and Allison "Alli" Copeland; her great-grandchildren, Charlie Booth, Grant Booth, Parker Garrett, Cade Garrett, Jack Johnson, and her newest great-granddaughter, Mary Kate Johnson.

Ila Grey is also survived by her brothers, Earl McIlwean and Ed McIlwean and wife, Sandi; her brother-in-law, Neel Linker; and many nieces, nephews and extended family and friends, whom she loved dearly.

Ila Grey was preceded in death by her parents; her husband, Thomas Lewis; and her siblings, Gene McIlwean and Bunny McIlwean Linker.

A celebration of Ila Grey's life will be held on Saturday, February 7, 2026 at 11 am at Beech Grove Methodist Church in New Bern, NC. In lieu of flowers, the family requests that memorials be made to Beech Grove Methodist Church in New Bern, North Carolina, Hertford United Methodist Church in Hertford, North Carolina, or the Ila McIlwean White Family and Consumer Sciences Program Endowment at North Carolina State University.

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